外国段子手都如何吐槽朝鲜氢弹试验成功

爱思英语编者按：昨日，朝鲜宣布氢弹试验成功，外国段子手们按耐不住了，各种吐槽如烟花般齐放。

North Korea today conducted a 'successful' hydrogen bomb test, Pyongyang has confirmed.The detonation of the thermonuclear weapon triggered a 5.1 magnitude earthquake when it exploded at 10am local time in the north east of the country, the tremors of which were felt many miles away.
平壤确认，朝鲜今日“成功”进行了氢弹测试。氢弹于当地时间上午十点引爆，引爆地点位于朝鲜东北部城市，此次引爆造成了5.1级地震，数英里外都能感到震感。

核心提示：若真如官方所说“成功”测试氢弹，即为核发展的重大一步。消息一出，各国已炸毛……

France
法国

France has now condemned the nuclear test and has called for a “strong reaction from the international community”, president François Hollande’s office said in a statement. The statement said the claims of a hydrogen bomb detonation were “an unacceptable violation of [UN] security council resolutions”.
法国谴责了朝鲜的核试验，并号召“国际社会对此要给予强烈回应”，法国总统弗朗索瓦·奥朗德在的官方声明中提到。该声明中还称，氢弹引爆是“对联合国安理会决议不可接受的违背”。

South Korea
韩国

President Park Geun-Hye called the test a “grave provocation” at an emergency meeting of the country’s national security council. “The test is not only a grave provocation to our national security but also a threat to our future … and a strong challenge to international peace and stability,” she said, calling for strong sanctions on Pyongyang.
韩国总统朴槿惠在国安会紧急会议上将此次试验称为一次“严重挑衅”。“这次试验不仅是对我们国家安全的一次严重挑衅，更威胁到了我们的未来……是对国际和平与稳定的一个重大挑战，”朴槿惠说。她号召对平壤采取强烈制裁。

Japan
日本

“The nuclear test that was carried out by North Korea is a serious threat to the safety of our nation and we absolutely cannot tolerate this,” prime minister Shinzo Abe said in Tokyo.“This clearly violates UN security council resolutions and is a grave challenge against international efforts for non-proliferation,” he said, adding his country would seek to coordinate efforts among UN members to tackle North Korea’s actions.
“朝鲜进行的核试验是对日本国家安全的一次严重威胁，我们完全无法容忍这一行径，”日本首相安倍晋三在东京提到。“这一行径明显违背了联合国安理会决议，对国际核武器不扩散行动是一次严重挑战，”他说道。此外，他还声称日本会在联合国成员中寻求合作，以阻止朝鲜的行为。

United States
美国

In Washington, the White House said it could not yet confirm the test, but vowed to “respond appropriately to any and all North Korean provocations”. It said the US “will not accept [North Korea] as a nuclear state”.
位于华盛顿的白宫声称他们尚未确认此次核试验，但他们会“对朝鲜所有的挑衅行为做出适当的反应”。

China
中国

There was no immediate response from China, but in a report from Pyongyang, the official Xinhua news service said that the “test apparently runs counter to relevant UN resolutions” and “is set to cause repercussions”.
中国尚未对此事发表回复，但根据平壤的报道，官媒新华社新闻认为“核试验明显违背了联合国相关决议”，并且会造成严重后果”。

Australia
澳大利亚

Foreign minister Julie Bishop said her country “condemns in the strongest possible terms” the test, which “confirms North Korea’s status as a rogue state and a continuing threat to international peace and security”, adding that Canberra would express its concerns to Pyongyang directly and call for stronger UN sanctions.
澳大利亚外长朱莉·毕晓普称，澳大利亚“强烈谴责”朝鲜核实验；并将朝鲜称为“流氓国家”，认为朝鲜会对国际和平与安全造成长久的威胁。她还说，堪培拉会继续对平壤表示关切并呼吁联合国对朝鲜给予更强烈的制裁。

United Kingdom
英国

Philip Hammond, the British foreign secretary, has just sat down with a small group of foreign correspondents in Beijing, where he is on an official visit. Foreign secretary Philip Hammond said: “If North Korean H-bomb test reports are true, it is a grave breach of UN [security council] resolutions and a provocation which I condemn without reservation.”
英国外长菲利普·哈默德此时正在北京进行官方访问，紧急接受了外国记者的采访。他说：“如果朝鲜的氢弹试验报道属实，那这就是对联合国安理会决议的严重违背，我们严厉谴责这种挑衅行为。

对于朝鲜的核试验，外国段子手们也是操碎了心：

@Dallas：

Maybe Kim Jong-Un dropped his burger.
“也许只是金正恩的汉堡掉在了地上。”

@canguy:

"Was it just fat boy breaking wind perhaps?"
“可能只是那个胖男孩放了个屁？”
这个段子一语双关，fat boy 既指金正恩，同时又隐喻了当年美国在广岛和长崎投下的两颗原子弹，一颗叫fat man，一颗叫little boy。

@Patric Gray:

it could have been a nuclear bomb.Or Kim falling over.
“可能是核试验。也可能只是金正恩摔倒了。”

@TheCosmos：

Somebody needs to sanction the DPRK immediately with a carbon tax fine.
要立即对朝鲜制裁，向他们征收烟尘排放税罚款！

@Tynemouth Geordie：

If true, it makes a mockery of all the "green taxes" we are paying.
如果这是真的，那这对我们承担的“绿色税收”是赤裸裸的嘲笑啊！

@markb411：

UN Security Council to decide to drop the N Koreans an e mail telling them that the US did the H bomb bit in 1952.
联合国安理会决定给朝鲜发封邮件，告诉他们，美国早在1952年就引爆了氢弹！

@TheKernel：

Did anybody seriously expect non-proliferation? As long as anybody has them, others will want them.
真的有人希望不扩散核武器吗？只要有国家持有核武器，其他国家就想拥有！