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The Judge and the Plaintiff

3
  A MAN of Experience in Business was awaiting the judgment of the
Court in an action for damages which he had brought against a
railway company.  The door opened and the Judge of the Court
entered.

  "Well," said he, "I am going to decide your case to-day.  If I
should decide in your favour, I wonder how you would express your
satisfaction?"

  "Sir," said the Man of Experience in Business, "I should risk your
anger by offering you one half the sum awarded."

  "Did I say I was going to decide that case?" said the Judge,
abruptly, as if awakening from a dream.  "Dear me, how absent-
minded I am.  I mean I have already decided it, and judgment has
been entered for the full amount that you sued for."

  "Did I say I would give you one half?" said the Man of Experience
in Business, coldly.  "Dear me, how near I came to being a rascal. 
I mean, that I am greatly obliged to you."

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