Tightwad 吝啬鬼

Joe Schmidt, although very wealthy, was a tightwad.

One day he and his wife wanted to take a spin in an airplane over the city of New York.

The pilot said it would be 10 dollars a piece for a thirty-minute flight. "How about 10 dollars for both of us?" the stingy millionaire asked, "No way!" replied the pilot firmly. Schmidt pleaded earnestly with the pilot for quite a while. Since it was a slow day and there were not many customers, the pilot finally agreed. "Ok, I will take you and your wife for ten bucks on one condition: while in the air, you cannot make any noise. If I hear a peep out of you, that will cost you 20 dollars." Schmidt agreed reluctantly.

The plane took off without a hitch. Purposely, the pilot made somersaults（筋斗） and all kinds of tricks, just to scare the guy, when the plane finally landed, the pilot asked credulously: "I have got to hand it to you. I didn't know how you managed to be so quiet. " "It's wasn't easy," confessed the tightwad. "I almost hollered（叫喊，抱怨） when my wife fell out."

乔·施密特虽然非常富有，却是个不折不扣的吝啬鬼。

一天，他和妻子打算乘飞机俯瞰全纽约。

飞行员每次飞行30分钟，每人10美元。吝啬鬼问道：“我们两个人10美元怎么样？”“不行！”飞行员斩钉截铁地回答道。施密特哀求了好一会儿。飞行员看当天生意不好，乘客也少，最终同意了他的请求。“好吧，你和你太太总共10美元，但条件是，在空中你们不能发出任何声音，如果我听见了你们当中有人出声，那就得付20美元了。”施密特不情愿的答应了。

飞机顺利起飞了，飞机驾驶员在空中翻跟斗，做出各种花样故意吓唬施密特。飞机着陆后，飞行员不解地问道，：“你真是太厉害了，你怎么能一直保持安静呢？”“其实要做到这点真的很难，当我老婆掉下飞机时，我差点就喊出来了。”这个吝啬鬼坦言道。