101 It's me. Just wondered how you are. 102 I'm fine, thanks. Everything all right with you? 103 [whispering]] Fine, thoug]h, er,... 104 I've just had a rather g]raphic shag] flashback. 105 And you do have a g]enuinely g]org]eous bottom. 106 Thank you. 107 I'm with the Mexican ambassador, the head of Amnesty lnternational 108 and the Undersecretary for Trade and lndustry. 109 And you're on speakerphone. 110 Oh. Rig]ht, well... 111 I'm quite busy with important stuff too... 112 Bridg]et, we're waiting] for that tape about Tom, the happy hamster. 113 - [Mark] I'll call when I've finished. - Excellent. 114 And Richard wants to see you about that crap skydiving] report. 115 [whispers] Oh, fuck. 116 Oh, dear. Is this the end of my career? 117 No, it can't be. 118 I will fight this. I am a journalist of the highest standards and integrity. 119 [tape whirs] 120 [on tape] This is Bridget Jones reporting from a big vat of excrement. 121 Look, I never said I could skydive and I'm terrified of heig]hts, 122 - so it was really hard to concentrate. - Be quiet. They loved it upstairs. 123 Loved it. And they want us to come up with another reg]ular spot for you. 124 [laug]hs] Oh, my God. That's... 125 - I won't let you down, Richard. - Precisely. 126 ...my friends' motto was "When in Rome, do as many Romans as you can. " 127 But if your tastes are marginally more highbrow, I also have tips. 128 Forget the Forum, definitely forget the Coliseum, 129 no fun now they can't slaughter Christians. 130 Forget the Sistine Chapel, first example of a poof interior designer gone mad... 131 What is Daniel Cleaver doing] on the television? 132 It's called The Smooth Guide. "Making] culture bearable". 133 ...equally serene and equally beautiful Professore Giovana Dabrache. 134 who is about to show me her diptych. 135 Same old creep. [chuckles] 136 Oh. Shame. 137 He always speaks very warmly of you. 138 - Oh, yeah? - Yeah. 139 How about we g]o out for a bite to eat tonig]ht? 140 Oh. Can't. I have to g]o out with my boyfriend. 141 - He's a human rig]hts lawyer. - I know. 142 I'm meeting] him for a romantic supper. 143 - [mobile rings] - Oh. 144 - Bridg]et Jones. - Bridget, it's Mark. 145 Oh. I was just talking] about you. 146 I'm running] late. Do you want me to cancel? 147 - Oh. No, that's fine. - Are you sure? 148 Be as late as you like. 149 Chuck him, while you're not preg]nant with his unwanted child. 150 I only said he was working] late. |