我早就说了嘛

Those 4 words never sounded so good

我从未觉得这几个字如此动听

til the June morning

直到一个六月的早晨

in my mom's hospital room.

在母亲的病房里

It began when my mother was admitted to the hospital

事情的开始是这样的，我母亲要住院

for a really bad infection in her bladder.

因为膀胱有严重的感染

It was November 21

那是11月21日

when they called us to her hospital room

医院把我们一家人叫到母亲的病房里

to tell us my mom had a mass tumor

告诉我们，母亲长了一个肿块肿瘤

it was big in her stomach

在她的胃里，面积很大

and it was malignant.

是个恶性肿瘤

They went over a couple of options

他们列出了几种治疗方案

but all I heard was MDAnderson & biopsy.

我却只听到了癌症中心和活体检查

That same night at about 2 a.m.

当天夜里，凌晨两点钟的时候

my mom got dressed

我母亲穿戴整齐

called my stepdad

叫上我的继父

and walked out of that hospital,

两人走出了医院

she wanted to go home.

她想要回家

The next morning

第二天早上

we went to talk to the surgeon

我们去找医生谈话

to find out what does this mean,

去询问母亲昨晚的举动有何用意

how long does she have by refusing treatment

她这样拒绝治疗，还剩下多少日子

& he said 15 days

他说，大概半个月

maybe less.

也可能更少

I was so scared

我害怕极了

I couldn't accept losing my mom

我不能承受失去母亲的痛苦

my only parent

双亲里我只剩下她了

since dad died when I was 5 yrs old.

因为我5岁的时候父亲就过世了

My stepdad was an ok kinda person

我的继父是一个不冷不热的人

just not involved with our lives growing.

在我们成长过程中，都没有管过我们

So 15 days,

所以，还有半个月

I had

这就是我所有的全部

to pray, to beg, to cry,

我只有这些时间去祈祷，去乞求，去痛哭流涕

to spend time with my mom.

去与母亲共度

I didn't judge her decision

我没有职责她放弃治疗的决定

she's my mom

她是我的母亲

she has earned the right to decide what she wants.

她有权决定自己想要的是什么

My siblings didn't see it that way

我的兄弟姐妹们并不这样想

but really what can you do.

可是你能怎么做呢

I asked everyone I came in contact with

我对自己能联系上的每一个人都发出了请求

if they could say wish good luck for my mom,

我问他们能否祝我母亲好运

I mean everyone.

我说的是所有人

The day came and went

日子一天天过去

and she did sleep a lot

她确实睡得很多

but my stepdad says she seems ok,

但是继父说，她看起来情况还不错

when I'd go visit her

当我去看望她的时候

I would just sit and stare at her

我坐在那里，紧紧的盯着她

I imagine she probably felt like a specimen under a microscope

我想，她大概觉得自己就像是显微镜下面的一个标本

because she'd just cough

因为，她只不过喝水呛了一下

and all heads turned to her glasses of water

所有人都看向她手中的水杯

in every direction

从各个方向看着她

my poor mom.

我可怜的妈妈

Then 7 months later

7个月过后

she ends up back in hospital

她又住进了医院

because her bladder is hurting real bad.

因为她的膀胱疼的很厉害

I remember sitting there

我记得自己坐在那里

just me and my granddaughter

只有我和我的小孙女

because she really wanted to visit her G.G.Ma

因为她很想看望一下她的曾祖母

and I watched her do her crossword puzzle

我看着她玩字谜

trying to sneak in a picture here and there.

设法在这里那里拼出一个图案来

The oncologist walks in the room

医生走进病房

asks my mom how she feeling

问我母亲感觉如何

she says I feel fine

她说，我感觉挺好的

can I go home now?

今天我能回家了吗

The Dr then says

医生说

i'm sorry

实在抱歉

but I cannot be your doctor

可是，我没法给你看病

so I cannot make that decision.

所以，我也不能决定你何时出院

She looks confused

母亲一脸的疑惑

I'm stunned

我也感到十分惊讶

so I asked what did my mom do now?

于是问道，我妈妈又做了什么

He smiled

医生笑了笑

and looked my mom straight in her eyes

直直的看着母亲的眼睛

he says I'm a cancer doctor

他说，我是一个肿瘤医生

since all your tests came back clear

你的结果都非常好

I cannot be in charge of your care.

我不能再掌管你的健康问题了

I'm looking at him

我定定的看着医生

wide eyed big goofy smile

双目圆瞪，一脸傻笑

and as I turned to see my mom's reaction

我转过头去看母亲的反应

she picks up her crossword puzzle

母亲拿起我女儿的字谜游戏

says as casual as can be

用最随意的语气说

"See I told you I wasn't sick!"

“看吧，都跟你说了，我没病！”

I could only manage to say

我一时百感交集，只能说出话一句

"yup you sure did mom."

“嗯呐，你确实说过，妈妈”

That was 2 and a half years ago

这是两年半之前的事情

and she's still mouthier as ever

她还和往常一样巧言善辩

but I went and thanked everyone

我向所有的人都道谢了

because I truly witnessed a miracle first hand.

因为我真的亲眼见证了一个奇迹