Joke: Southern Living
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When You Live In The DEEP South : * You take your dog for a walk and you both use the same tree. * You can entertain yourself for more than an hour with a flyswatter. * Your property has been mistaken for a recycling center. * Your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years. * You burn your yard rather than mow it. * The Salvation Army declines your mattress. * Your entire family sat around waiting for a call from the governor to spare a loved one. * You offer to give someone the shirt off your back and they don't want it. * You have the local taxidermist on speed dial. * You come back from the dump with more than you took. * You keep a can of Raid on the kitchen table. * You've ever bathed with flea and tick soap. * You've been involved in a custody fight over a hunting dog. * You know how many bales of hay your car will hold. * You have a rag for a gas cap. * You've hit on somebody in a VD clinic. * Your house doesn't have curtains but your truck does. * Your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand. * Your richest relative buys a new house and calls you up to help him take the wheels off. * Your working TV sits on top of your non-working TV. * A tornado hits your neighborhood and does $100,000 worth of home improvements. |
