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101
make sure you boys had a decent meal to look forward to in the morning. 102
I know you're out of your minds with grief. 103
Yes, we are. 104
Of course, I will need the baskets back once you're done. 105
Of course. 106
Susan Mayer, who lives across the street, 107
brought macaroni and cheese. 108
Her husband Carl always teased her about her macaroni, 109
saying it was the only thing she knew how to cook, 110
and she rarely made it well. 111
It was too salty the night she and Carl moved into their house. 112
It was too watery the night she found lipstick on Carl's shirt. 113
She burned it the night carl told her he was leaving her for his secretary. 114
A year had passed since the divorce. 115
Susan had started to think how nice it would be to have a man in her life, 116
even one who would make fun of her cooking. 117
Mom... why would someone kill themselves? 118
Well... sometimes people are so unhappy, 119
they think that's the only way they can solve their problems. 120
But mrs. Young always seemed happy. 121
Yeah, sometimes people pretend to be one way on the outside when they're totally different on the inside. 122
Oh, you mean like how dad's girlfriend always smiling and says nice things, 123
but deep down, you just know she's a bitch? 124
I don't like that word, Julie. 125
But, yeah, that's a great example. 126
Hey, what's going on? Sorry I'm late. 127
Hi, susan. 128
Hey. So, what did Carl say when you confronted him? 129
You'll love this. He said... 130
"it doesn't mean anything. It was just sex." 131
Ah, yes, page one of the philanderer's handbook. 132
Yeah, and then he got this zen look on his face, and he said, "you know, Susan, 133
most men live lives of quiet desperation." 134
Please tell me you punched him. 135
No, I said, "really? And what do most women lead 136
lives of noisy fulfillment?" 137
Hmm. Good for you. 138
I mean, of all people, did he have to bang his secretary? I had that woman over for brunch. 139
It's like my grandmother always said -- an erect penis doesn't have a conscience. 140
Even the limp ones aren't that ethical. 141
This is half the reason I joined the NRA. 142
Well, when Rex started going to those medical conferences, 143
I wanted it in the back of his mind that he had a loving wife at home 144
with a loaded Smith & Wesson. 145
Lynnie, Tom's always away on business. Do you ever worry he might? 146
Oh, please, the man's gotten me pregnant three times in four years. 147
I wish he was having sex with someone else. 148
So, Susan, is he going to stop seeing that woman? 149
I don't know. 150
I'm sorry, you guys. I just... | 
